2012

In Circles

Note to self

Norm's bench

A few years ago after year that turned me upside down in a number of ways, I was invited by a friend to spend a few months in Vienna. A way to kind of get away from it all, while still being a part of it all. The experience was cathartic. If you were reading my blog at the time then you know all about it, and I’ll assume you were and not rehash it all again here. My time in Vienna helped me remember who I was and what was important to me. I left there with a different and I think wholly better perspective on my life and where I was at and where I was headed. I grew a lot over those months and in the years since then I’m always thought fondly of the city and the people that helped me wrap my head around so many things. I’ve visited often, and have quite the emotional connection to the place now.

Next week I’ll be heading back again, this time with my wife and son, and I’m so very excited to spend time with them in this place that is so important to me. I’m looking forward to what we’ll experience together there, without having any idea what that will be. I’m also hoping some of the inspiration that lit such a fire in my head, even just a spark, will help me figure out which next steps to take and how to take them.

Sean’s Voting Guide

This election season, not unlike other election seasons I’ve had a number of friends forward me their voting guides. I’ve seen a number of publications and organizations publish their voting guides. I’ve had people ask me if I make a voting guide would I please send it to them so they can send out to their friends, families and assorted mailing lists. These people are all well meaning and trying to do what they think is the right thing.

I think voting guides are fucking disgusting.

Committing myself

com·mit [kuh-mit] verb, com·mit·ted, com·mit·ting.
verb (used with object)
1. to give in trust or charge; consign.
2. to consign for preservation: to commit ideas to writing; to commit a poem to memory.
3. to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; express (one’s intention, feeling, etc.): Asked if he was a candidate, he refused to commit himself.
4. to bind or obligate, as by pledge or assurance; pledge: to commit oneself to a promise; to be committed to a course of action.

I have a problem with commitment. Not in relation to other people, I feel like I’m pretty good in that respect. I have a problem committing to myself.

The front page of my website makes a bit of a joke about how no one knows what I do. On one hand this is a manifestation of the reality that I do a lot of things and trying to concisely sum that up always proves difficult and awkward. I have a short attention span and have been accused of being a workaholic at several points in my life which results in having my hands in lots of seemingly unrelated things. Peeling back the layers a bit often reveals reoccurring themes so they aren’t all as unrelated as they seem, they just aren’t easy to quickly explain.

On the other hand, if I don’t make the commitment and say I’m doing ________, then I don’t have to think about how good or bad I am at _________. “I’m just dabbling” is a bulletproof excuse against accusations of not doing something well enough. Accusations from myself. I’m notoriously my own worst critic. Trust me, the reason I don’t give a shit what anyone else has to say about me or my work is because no matter how harsh it is, it’s nothing compared to what I’ve already said myself. That also makes it really hard to take a compliment, which may or may not be another issue all together. Some examples…

Year Of Less Update #7

It’s time for me to admit defeat.

Not in a “I failed, I give up” way, but in a “I went about this all wrong and set my self up to fail, but I learned a lot and have a better idea for a second try already” way.

The simple reason is that I just made too many rules.

Not that it was too many rules to keep track of, I tried to keep them simple enough from the start, but aiming to do something every single day, especially when you have a rather hectic schedule to begin with is difficult. So I often found myself gaming my own rules – not because I wanted to get away with something, but rather because I was running late or I’d forgotten and was just trying to do things to cross them off the list. At 11:15 PM I’d be digging through my t-shirt drawer to find one I could quickly throw out so that I could say I got rid of something that day. Which of course was disappointing, so I’d make new rules to compensate and the whole things kept getting more difficult. Add travel and everything else to the mix and I should have known there was no way this was going to work out as planned.

Checking in on everyday

Waiting

A few months ago I wrote about things I wanted to do on a daily basis because they are important to me. In efforts to keep myself in check I thought I’d review that list again and see how I’m doing. I can tell you right that this isn’t going to be a positive review. I’m really, exceptionally good at distracting myself with random life things and messing up my plans. Which is in part why I kind of go overboard on the self structuring sometimes, without it who knows what kind of a disaster I’d be.

Dear Marissa Mayer

Last night I bought the domain dearmarissamayer.com and put this up:

Dear Marissa Mayer

A quick simple request, but a heartfelt one. Yesterday it was announced that Marissa Mayer, one of the earliest and most noteworthy Google employees, was taking over as CEO of Yahoo!. This is incredibly exciting for so many reasons on it’s own, but in terms of Yahoo! itself, I think flickr is their most underrated product and if they would put some support behind it, bring it up to date, give it an actually functional mobile app and commit to keeping it alive, that would be amazing. It’s no secret that everyone blames Yahoo! for killing flickr, but I don’t believe it’s dead yet, and Marissa could be the one to breath life back into it. So here’s hoping.